This Nauseating Writey Stuff

I am currently writing a book.

Let me repeat that: I am currently going through hell trying to type words hoping it would one day end up as something most rational creatures would consider a book.

*pukes*

Trying to finish a novel is different from creating short stories, essays, and say, a blog post. Mostly it’s because it needs one stubborn ass of a determined typing idiot person , and skill if you’d be honest (talent, um, well maybe that too…but many novels apparently lack a touch of that. Yes, I’m Miss Judgeymonster).

I have never finished a novel before. Never. I have tried but I never even reached halfway of traditional novel length before I gave up and let it rot in my hard drive.

Maybe it was the lack of will, maybe it was life getting in the way, maybe I have some form of ADHD, maybe it was blah blah shitty shitty ah.

But for now, I’m publishing this and will never take it out because I wanted a sort of reminder that would be shared possibly with one or two, maybe five people at the most who’d bother to read this. Something that might make you say, “Hey, how’s that book writing going on?” Yeah, and I’d have to squirm and feel nauseating guilt rushing up from my guts as I’d try to let out a comprehensible answer and not just “HE HE bookglargglarg EH UM wadafuckchutalkingabout ERrggG”

This time, I want to finish a first completed draft that would inevitably, absofuckinlutely suck salty ass.

That is all. It’s one little step at a time, right? But yeah, I plan to kick my butt into writing everyday to add up to the pages of my future book. And I’m gonna do this for as long as it takes to retch the story out from my creative brainmuck. And damn me to writer hell if I stop in the middle of the tormenting, monster-filled road to novel completion this time.

Yeah.

*stares silently in space.

Yeah. I am currently writing a book.

*pukes*

31 comments
    • Holy smurfs, I already have one reader for something that’s not even existing yet! You’re wonderful. Just imagine how much you’d hate yourself wasting your time if my writing turns out as crap.

    • That’s the CAN-DO spirit I like! Onward through the fog and all that…

      Hey, are you okay? Do you have a bit of a rainstorm out there?

      • I’m actually doing well, thanks. That storm just passed through this part of the country but we still didn’t take any chances. It was twice stronger than the one that hit us two years ago and more than a thousand died that time. But that’s basically the people snubbing the warnings and being bullheaded so yeah I’m practically saying they deserved to die (no they don’t…maybe. Whatever). But I’m fine, family’s fine, and weather’s getting better. This part at least. It’s amazing you even know this!

    • What?! It’s pretty big news! Here in the U.S., it’s in all the papers and on TV, too. Besides, I like to fancy myself a resident of the world.

      I know what you mean about the bull-heads. We had a terrible storm here in New York/New Jersey exactly one year ago called Sandy. A bunch of jack-offs refused to leave their homes, so emergency rescue teams had to risk their lives to go fish them out. And some of them had the nerve to complain that they took too long to get there! Don’t get me started…

      • Yeah, I heard about Sandy.This typhoon’s supposed to be as big as that (it even covers our entire little country in the satellite views hahaha). I blame myself for not being updated about the news then (Can you really blame me for not caring? It’s the same thing over and over again, don’t ya think?)

        And ARGG I know! Despite all of the typhoons we’ve been having the past year, it’s amazing how there are still people who act exactly like that. Really, I want to say I have a deep love for humanity but humanity’s making it real difficult! Okay I’ll stop here now…

    • I get the last word…People who climb mountains or travel into the deep, dark wilderness to camp and then get STUCK and expect rescue teams to FETCH THEM should be left right where they are. I read an article not long ago about the exorbitant expense and risk to life an limb to mount a helicopter rescue mission to get extreme-skiers off the tops of mountains, which, apparently happens on a fairly regular basis. I don’t want to appear callous but, really, when are we going to stop saving people from their own stupidity and inflated egos?

      I’m sorry…what was this post about? I forget.

      • Hahahaha! People should just eat each other really. Nobility and respect for human life are so overrated. Do you think if you eat stupid people you’d be infected with the stupidity?

        Um, this was a post about me whining about something to the internet because that makes everything more real I guess. Surprise surprise.

  1. Best of luck with the novel, Jenny. You’ll get there, one word at a time.

    • Thank you, J.D! :) Yeah, have to keep on writing even though that evil voice is always whispering how much I suck. Blast that fucking demon.

  2. Saying it out loud makes it real. Now you have all of to be on your case as well as your judge. So should Iake nice and say you can do it or just kick your ass too. ;)

    • Eeck, I’m kinda sensitive in the butt area so yes I can do it! ;) Wanna help me with some writing spell or stuff? I know you know one, hee hee…

  3. Micah said:

    What’s it gonna be about?

    • You know, I’m still figuring it out. It’s gonna have one character with menstruation problems though (not the best way to market a book, ha!) and it’s probably safe to say you could put it up there in the expansive fantasy genre.

  4. You know I find your attitude to be complete shit, which is why I like you. I hope your book is about sex. I’m pretty sure I would like that. Slipperly, unrepentant sex in awkward cubbyholes, I should suppose, plus some vaguely-militaristic cutlery utilized to great success as Colonel Mustard mutilates his stuffed monkey (if you know what I mean). Well, I’m quite happy you’re writing a book, and have decided to care about the whole thing, but I must tell you my friend, the correct word is “writerly”. There is no such word as “writey”. I should know. I’m British. Don’t let the accent fool you. Peace. Out. Big. Boy Scout.

    • Yo, Mr. Lewin, you’ve had one too many again, didn’t you?

      And I will never think of the word cutlery the same again, thanks. It’s up on the same notch now with words such as starting with D and ending with O. And no my writing is not erotica, although I should probably make it one. And fuck you for telling me off with your “writerly” bullpoop. The only dictionary I own that you could actually caress with your hands doesn’t have the word fuck in it. Is that saying the word fuck doesn’t exist? No. So with that flawless reasoning we’re going to have to agree “writey” is an actual word. End of story. Ignore the fact that I have a very outdated dictionary.

      I do look forward to reading your book. Yes, pressure pressure.

      • Dude, one too many is my specialty. I believe the word fuck is real, as is the word “writerly”. One day you can read my book, but I should probably finish it first.

  5. I can totally relate. I, too, am trying to write a novel. It’s tough all right and requires a lot of discipline. Keep going and don’t give up. Good luck with it.

    • November is a busy month for writers, isn’t it? (Eeeck I just implied I’m a writer! Blerwack!) And oh yes, it does test your self-discipline. It’s hard work alright. Especially if it’s a rainy day like now and bed looks so comfy and…yes, yes, discipline.

      I’m sending good vibes back your way, sis! ;) Damn if we don’t need it.

  6. The Adventures of Spiro and D.F. is going to be my new favorite book. Based on true events of course.

  7. You go girl!!! You’ve done two important steps: Make yourself do it every day, and tell people about it! So get going! Besides, you’re a lot of fun to read so you can do this!
    Also, I happen to be on the other side of the coin. I suck at writing short stories, but give me a novel idea I love and you won’t see me for a year cause I’ll be off in my own little world!
    You can do this!
    And I think that’s more than one or two or five of us!

    • Aww, thank you! I’m kinda feeling liquid on the inside from all these support. You people are better than squishy monster pillows and deserve chocolate chip ice cream with lots of almonds. Or chicken ice cream, if you dig that.

      And wow, what specifically do you find difficult in writing short stories? It’s amazing how different things work for different people. I’m better at finishing short stories because, well, they’re shorter. I’m not saying the quality’s necessarily good though haha. I think I lacked the discipline before in finishing a novel. But there’s always a first time for everything, right? That or there’s no hope for me and I should just give up on my dreams. Noooo that’s not an option!

      • Do not give in! Just keep at it….and gross – Chicken ice cream???? lol
        I think for me, and this sounds funny, but short stories are hard because they require more self-control. I have always been a verbose person in my talking and writing, so keeping something short and on track is very hard. I feel like Short Stories have to be purposed in a way that requires a lot of developmental skill in a very small space. A novel gives me room to try out lots of ideas without worrying about it getting to long. :-)

  8. I guess,you not use a General English or a Mainstream English :-)

  9. Page 28 said:

    Reading the comments on this I realize my inkling that you were in the Philippines was right. Very glad you apparently weren’t affected by that typhoon. Our news just said 10,000 gone. Un-fucking-imaginable. Did the Philippines do something bad recently? The Earth sure seems to be trying to wipe it off the map.

    • It is sooo heartbreaking, really. Peace and order is also such a big problem now in affected areas. We’re still not certain how many casualties since communication is still down on some areas but I know the numbers have already reached thousands (although I doubt it reached 10,000 yet…that would be so…no words for that horror). Relief efforts are dragged because of the impaired means of communication. Really, this is a fucking major calamity for my people. We don’t know where to start. The current atmosphere now is helplessness and shock. But we are moving. I guess that’s what’s important.

      • Page 28 said:

        Things like this remind me how little the universe must give a damn (and thus how much more so we should to compensate). Granted I grew out of some of my more flowery charity notions, but I wonder if and when humanity accepts responsibility for itself and whether it will allow itself to be dictated by events like this in the future, I wonder what things will then be like.

        Arggg /end unnecessarily waxing philosophical.

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